#1 WAIT ON IT!
Having lived on a tight budget for years now, I have learned through some stupid mistakes how to say no to myself (and my kids...and my husband). Everything always goes on sale. And if it doesn't, well, I have learned to get over it. Living in Italy, sales happen twice a year, once after Christmas and the other in the summer. A hat that my daughter has been begging for from the Disney Store (for at least four months), I was able to purchase for four Euro just tonight, instead of 20 Euro. The great lesson: Delayed Gratification.
#2 CUT IT UP!
Sure, it sucks being poor. But if you have chosen to live in an urban setting, chances are the benefits of that lifesyle outweigh the alternatives in your mind, so the first thing you should do is to look around and remind yourself how cool it is to have the opportunity to live the urban life. Second thing, remind yourself (and I seriously practice this daily) that there are millions of people dying around the world this very moment because they have no food. That ALWAYS PUTS EVERYTHING in perspective! Third thing, take out your credit card...that emergency one...that one that talks to you in sweet little whispers every time you go shopping and don't have the cash in the bank for those new jeans that make your butt look great and that are on sale and that give you that urban vibe that makes you have a little swing in your step while walking down the street. "Surely you will pay these off next paycheck," says the evil little plastic demon.
Remember: There are people dying all around the world! They don't think about new jeans. They think about survival. Reminding yourself of this, I promise that you will survive this moment...and the next. And for the love, give yourself some grace. It took me three tries and lots of stupid choices to get this one right! The good news is that when you don't have the option of a credit card, it's a LOT easier to say no! (See Dave Ramsey's tips on saving for emergencies so that you won't need a credit card).
#3 USE THE THINGS YOU BUY!
The Western World is completely driven by consumerism. They (the evil empire and the like) tell you that you NEED it....that "it" will make your life easier and better and more fun and lalala. However, there are only 24 hours in a day. The average person works eight of those hours and sleeps another eight. That leaves only eight hours of personal time in your day. So before you buy another gadget or another surfboard even though you live in the midwest or another kitchen appliance even though you eat out most of the time, ask yourself if this thing is really going to enhance your life or if perhaps it is going to add one more thing to the garage sale in two years. And if the answer to the question is still "Yes, it will enhance my life," then for the love of my aunt, USE IT!
#4 DO YOU REALLY NEED TWO CARS?
So the world has been around for thousands (and most say billions) of years. ONLY IN THE LAST 100 YEARS has the car been in existence. Does this astound anyone else? There was a time when even wealthy families were lucky to have one car. Now, in our American mindset, it is assumed that every family would have at least two cars. I understand that circumstances prevail at times, but I also think that having one car, especially in an urban setting, is completely do-able. We lived in Chicago for three years with one car. Sure, it meant that my husband had to take the train or that sometimes I was without a car. Again, when we lived in Indianapolis it was the same scenario. I learned to enjoy my neighborhood when my husband had the car. The great thing about living in the city is that you can walk to a cafe or a store or a park. It's a great challenge, even if you can afford two cars. And it has its obvious perks, like helping the environment, saving on gas, and preventing you from going on all those compulsive shopping trips to Target (eh hem...talking to myself here).
#5 TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ALL YOUR CITY HAS TO OFFER!
When we lived in Chicago, we were what America would call "poor." At one point, our family of five lived in 400 square feet together. However, I never felt poor because I took advantage of everything my city had to offer people in our socio-economic situation. For example, I found out about scholarships offered by the parks district for gymnastics for my kids and also scholarships offered by a great music school in the area. At one point, we paid $5.00 for Elias to take a music class that otherwise would have been $250. These programs exist for a reason and most of the time they go untapped, even though people have donated money for this very reason. Also, I discovered a program at the library where residents of Chicago could check out passes to different museums for FREE. Because of those passes, we were able to visit The Shedd Aquarium, The Museum of Science and Industry, as well as The Children's Museum for free!
#6 BUY THE GROCERIES YOU NEED...AND THEN USE THEM!
This may be a little more relevant to living in Europe. The cost of eating out is RIDICULOUS over here. The only places we ever "dine out" are Ikea, Burger King and McDonald's. However, this doesn't mean that we don't "mangia bene" (eat well) at home. Most of our costs over here go to food. We love having people into our home to share meals, especially in the summer, and we also love eating foods that are not loaded with preservatives. We buy most of our produce and meat fresh. This means that we shop almost daily for certain items. However, while it sounds like a pain, my theory is that when you put work into a meal and make it important, you are more likely to a) enjoy it and b) use everything you buy. When we lived in the States, countless food items would go bad in our refrigerator. Now we have a tiny refrigerator and freezer and even those are not stocked full. We use almost everything we buy because it's fresh and good quality and because we almost always "dine in." Food is an experience. When we only buy junk that is on sale, chances are we'll either get fat or let it go bad, meanwhile thinking "Did I have to buy ten just because it was 10 for $5?"
Another tip (if you have a family) is to pack a lunch when travelling to the zoo, the museum, the pool, or the park. I know that even The Children's Museum in Indianapolis has a place for people to sit with their sack lunches. We would always get a fountain drink from the museum but then eat our packed lunches. In some weird way, this satisfied our kids' cravings for "buying something" from the restaurant. Okay, and it satisfied my craving for a Diet Coke fresh from the fountain...with ice...and unlimited refills (Oh, America, I MISS YOU)!
#7 BUY YOUR PRODUCE IN SEASON
So you want good quality fruits and vegetables, but without the high price. Something I have learned to do while living overseas is that I buy most of my produce when it is "in season." This means that while I had to say no to my kids when they begged for watermelon a month ago, I can say yes now because it's in season and super cheap. I think it's fun because certain fruits like watermelon or strawberries or cherries become a treat for my kids and not something they get bored from.
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